1。 The Court’s Decision
法院的决定
Sir。 Clark， I have reviewed this case very carefully， the divorce court Judge said， and I‘ve decided to give your wife $775 a week。
Clark先生，我已经仔细审阅了这宗离婚案件，法官说，我决定判给你的妻子每周支付775美元。
That‘s very fair， Your Honor， the husband said。 and every now and then I’ll try to send her a few bucks myself。“
“那太好了，先生，”丈夫说，“那我也要给她一些钱。”
Explanation： When the Judge used the verb “give”， he meant his decision would give the woman $775。 It is normally the husband‘s duty （his requirement） to pay the alimony。 But this man， when he heard the word “give”， thought the Judge would pay it。
解释：法官说“给”，指的是他宣判的是要给女人775美元。同通常是由男方付赡养费。但是那个男人听到“给”这个词后，就以为法官会支付那笔费用。
2。 What’s his name？
他叫啥？
Bob told Betty that he had an acquaintance with a wooden leg named Smith。 So Betty asked him “That‘s very curious。 What was the name of his other leg？”
Bob 跟Betty说，他认识一个叫Smith的木腿。于是，Betty问他，“有点意思，那他的另一条腿叫什么？”
Explanation： Bob should have said he had “an acquaintance named Smith with a wooden leg”。 The way he said it， it seems the wooden leg‘s name is Smith！
解释：Bob 想说的是“一个有一条木腿的叫Smith的熟人”。而他那么说的话，给人感觉那条木腿叫Smith。
3。 Perfect Hearing
完美听力
Three retirees， each with a hearing loss， were playing golf one fine March day。 One remarked to the other， “Windy， isn‘t it？”
三个退休的老人，他们的听力都不太好了，在三月的一个晴天出去打高尔夫。一个人对另一个人说，“是个阴天，是吧？”
“No，” the second man replied， “it‘s Thursday。”
“不是”，第二个人回答说：“是星期四”。
And the third man chimed in， “So am I。 Let‘s have a beer。”
第三个人开心地说：“我也渴了，我们来杯啤酒吧。”
Explanation： The second man thought “Windy” was Wednesday （so he replied “No， it‘s Thursday”） then the third man thought “Thursday” was “thirsty” （so he thought of drinking some beer！）。
解释：第二个人以为“Windy（阴天）”是“Wednesday（星期三） ”，所以他回答说“不，是星期四。”然后第三个人以为“Thursday（星期四）”是“thirsty（渴）”（所以他还想着喝点啤酒呢！）。
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